I felt my blood pressuring rising. With the rise in blood pressure I felt my patience level evaporating. I know I had them here somewhere! I lifted another sofa cushion, looked in my purse once more, and toured the house again scanning shelf and table surfaces. Nothing. It’s always when I’m in a hurry, never when I’ve got time to spare. To be absolutely honest, it seems I’m always in a hurry.
“Here they are,” My husband called, from another room.
“Where were they? “ I asked snatching the set of keys ungratefully from his clutch.
“By the back door,” he answered as I swished out of the house without a courteous thank you. No time for common civility, I was already running late.
My first stop: the bank. I waited in line for the first available teller, and of course I waited patiently, not! When I was finally granted access to the Supreme Being (making a little more than minimum wage) behind the counter who had access to my money I frantically searched my purse and wallet for the check I had intended to cash. You think I could have been ready after waiting twenty minutes in line! But no, I was sure the check was in my possession. It seems I only thought I pocketed the darn thing before leaving home.
After my pointless trip to the bank I headed to the dollar store to get some cleaning supplies and doggy treats. At the checkout I opened my wallet to retrieve my bank card. No. I opened my wallet to find an empty slot where my bank card had been till yesterday when I got gas and replaced the card in my pants pocket till I got home where I had intended to reunite it with my wallet. I really had planned to put it back! I had to use a credit card instead for my purchases. At least I hadn’t misplaced that yet, but there was still time, the day was relatively young and I wasn’t.
At length I reached my dad’s house. I was taking him for a movie and exercise, which consisted of walking from the far end of the parking lot with his walker to the ticket stand. Every little bit of muscle usage kept him fit as an eighty four year old fiddle. Several kind (nosy butt-in-skies) people pointed out the handicapped parking spots I could have used. Did they think the handicap sticker on my car was because I was legally blind? With strained graciousness I politely thanked them and between gritted teeth explained that exercise has kept dad able to stay at home instead of in a nursing home on Medicare spending their tax dollars. The looks I got. Don’t blame me that people can’t mind their own business and I have to set them straight. They managed to get some chuckles however as they watched me hunt for my movie gift cards; I had to lose my place in line to trek back to my car (way at the end of the parking lot) to get them but at least I had them. This day can’t end soon enough!
At home again! My two dogs, a Shih-Tzu and black lab, met me at the door and were all giddy about the prospect of a neighborhood jaunt. How could I refuse their liquid black eyes all soft and wistful, plus I couldn’t deny the pleasure a relaxing stroll would bring my hassled soul. But first, I must find that mislaid check and bank card! After thirty minutes I found the check stuck between other papers in my (un)organized desk caddy and after frisking several of my pants I finally stumbled on the bank card on top of my make up case. Good place for it.
The dogs. They still were looking forward to their neighborhood patrol, now I had lost interest, but not heart, I couldn’t disappoint them, what a pushover I was for hang dog expressions. Two dogs, one leash. I won’t assault your ears with the words that exploded reflexively from my lips. While being followed by two exuberantly barking canines I opened drawers, closed drawers, searched the same counter tops I searched earlier for my car keys, looked under sofas while being licked in the face, inside dog kennels, under doggie mattresses while being sniffed in the....never mind, any where a dog might hide a chew toy, any where I might hide a chew toy. I found it! Where? Under the passenger car seat, (don’t ask!)
Today I’ve lost my patience, temper, manners and everything in between but thank heavens I haven’t lost my bed, I thought as I crawled exhaustedly under the covers, being thankful that tomorrow was another day. My eyes popped open at that concept. I don’t need another day like this! “Oh, God, please make tomorrow better!” I pleaded as I plummeted into slumber with the feeling of the all too familiar gastric reflux producing a vague ache in my sternum.
I awoke peacefully feeling absolutely wonderful. All my aches and pains had vanished, I felt years younger and pounds lighter, so light I felt as though I was floating on air. I stretched to shake my husband awake and found and empty space. Lots of empty space. The whole house in fact had vanished along with my aches, pains and pounds. I wasn't in Kansas anymore! Or anywhere close to the planet earth. There were people milling about in white gowns forming a line in front the largest pearl I’ve ever seen. Man, the oyster that formed that pearl had to have been big enough to end world hunger all by itself.
I hadn't gone to sleep with indigestion! If I’d known I was going to die in my sleep I would have dressed better. Another thought hit me as I watched the shrinking line. I patted myself down; nothing. No purse, no pockets, no underwear; no place to carry my proof of.....I ran to the edge of the cloud and attempted to dive back down. Bong. Bong. Each attempt to dive downwards was met by an impassable current of air causing me to belly flop. I was trapped. Trapped in heaven! Trapped in heaven waiting to enter the great white mother of all pearls.
An angel with a clipboard walked...(floated)... by and gave me a good long stare. "Something wrong?"
"You bet, I need to get down there, I forgot something very important!" I begged, trying desperately to part the clouds so I could get a view of my home, er, my old home.
"Darling, your time on earth is done, no return trips allowed."
"But I don't have my proof of...." I felt a panic attack rising from the tips of my toes to my head.
"Proof of what?"
"I need to go find my proof of salvation!" I begged. “I don't remember where I placed it!
The angel glanced at the papers in her hand and giggled, "Oh, you're the one that loses everything, you were actually our favorite reality show, we’ll miss you" she said, then patted me on the shoulder comfortingly, "But rest assured darling, the one thing you can never lose is your salvation, God has fool proofed that, you’ve been permanently stamped, sealed and delivered to his kingdom, now will you please take your place in line. Oh, and welcome to eternity.”
Wow, I was so relieved to know that for once I had been unable to lose something that I over looked the fact, (barely), that my first encounter with an angel resulted in my practically being called a fool.
I looked at the row of former people ahead of me, remembered how much I hated lines down there and sighed. Well, hopefully this was the last line ever I would have to transverse I thought as I marched towards the Pearl of all Pearls, unmindful that the halo that had rested on my skull had slid off and sunk deep down under cover of the clouds while the angel watched, delightedly. Apparently some things never change, even in heaven!
John 10: 28-29
Ephesians 1:3-6
Ephesians 1 :13-14
